Eventhough I will see some of my readers the next few days. I won't see all of you so I want wish everyone a Merry Christmas. Even if you don't like it. Too bad... I already have wished you a Merry Christmas it is too late. As a little present I have put up short story I wrote awhile back. Its not a Charlie Brown Christmas, but I like it.

"The Gift"

Some time around the first week of the year. I took a second look at one of our traditional Christmas decorations; it was a complete and total eyesore. It was a gift some old lady gave my mother 10 years ago for Christmas and I guess she felt obligated to put it on the tree each year. It was a gaudy looking knitted cat. It was one the most hideous things I have ever laid eyes on. They say its thought that counts well it’s the thought that angers me when I see it every year.

That same Christmas like every year an epidemic spread through the grade school. This year it was in the form of Sega, the newest video game system. Over greasy square pizza, pale yellow peas, and flavorless mashed potatoes shaped like an ice cream scoop, I would hear all the kids discuss the latest video games. I would try my best to stay absent from the conversation. I wouldn’t know what to say when they would ask me if I had gotten past the castle board yet.

One day went I went home I sat my father down and tried to tell him how I would benefit from having a Sega game system of my very own. I told him it would give me better hand eye coordination and against the popular notion it made kids zombies, I told him it acutally made them think and make quick decisions. He went on and on about how when he was a kid he would just use his imagination to have fun, and how kids today are spoiled. I think that conversation is had all over America in every family at one point and time. I used to think that my parents and all the other parents would go to secret meetings at night or when all their kids were in school and discuss stuff like this. I pictured a man with a gavel leading the meeting and hammering home the idea of telling children why they are spoiled and to shove vegetables down their throats. One time I actually searched my mother’s purse for a pamphlet when they got home late the night before.

That Christmas I was hoping for a miracle. I rushed down the steps that morning and studied each mystery. I did the shake test, the weight test and the hold them up to the sunlight test. As I tore, open each one my chances of getting the coveted Sega was getting slimmer and slimmer. All kinds of flashes were going off from my mother’s camera capturing images of me, and my reactions to each present.

Later that day my family and I went to my aunt and uncle’s for dinner. I was in a miserable mood the whole time. The only bright spot was that my cousin Robby who was about my age was there. And guess what he got for Christmas? Of course the very same Sega system. He told me he got it weeks before Christmas even came. Robby and I were always highly competitive. So while the sweet smell of the pending ham dinner dissipated through the air we settled down in front of the television. With all those weeks of practice, he had on me he humiliated me. I think he set a record for goals scored in a hockey game, shot my plane down about a dozen times, and beat me all over the wrestling ring. I went home feeling worse than I did when I realized I wasn’t getting the Sega.

On the ride home my father tried to reach out to me. But I just pushed him away. The image of my wrestler I was controlling laying on the floor after about 30 seconds was burning in my mind. I sat in fit of rage in the back seat as my parents were in the front. My father turned the radio down. He told me that maybe one day I would get one. But I didn’t hear it. I wanted to tell him how Robby’s parents weren’t any richer than we, that I was the only kid that didn’t have a Sega. But all that came out at the top of my tiny lungs was I HATE YOU! And instead of saying anything after that. I just repeated I HATE YOU! Because he was driving of course he had his back to me. But we passed a street light that light up the rear view window and I glimpse of his face. Suddenly I didn’t want to yell anymore. I didn’t apologize either, in fact no one said anything. The car just hummed along the rest of the ride.

About two months later I got a Sega for my birthday. It funny the minute I unwrapped the gift and realized what it was, I almost had to fake excitement. Sure I spend many a night in the glow of my television going to far off lands and winning championships, but I could never take those words back. At least in a video game you are blessed with more than one life. At the time I meant the words that came out of my mouth. I hated my father as much as I hate that stupid knit cat now. One time after coming home from a fishing trip with my father after many years of those words keeping me up at night, it figured it was time to apologize. However my mouth froze, I never did. I like to think that my father knew what I was thinking. Like I said they say it’s the thought that counts.

I put the rest of the ornaments in a box, and I carried them basement. I placed them in a closet we hardly used. It was full of dust and mildew. I rested the box right on top of the Sega.



MERRY CHRISTMAS TOO ALL MY READERS AND I HOPE YOU ALL GET LOTS OF COOL STUFF FROM SANTA

“Last Minute Shoppers”

Okay as a service to my loyal readers I am going to give you some hints for last minute Christmas shopping. Although I doubt all these people are on of your lists.


Trent Lott: A White Christmas

Flyers Center Jeremy Roenick: Anger management classes

NHL Commissioner Garry Bettman: A clue. Maybe a tape of fans cheering at games when a fight breaks out or a big hit is thrown.

Dan K.: A stool and a short but sturdy rope.

Elijah Wood: Tickets to that play about Santa Claus being gay playing in Philly. Perhaps this will get him to come out of the closet. Don’t ask me why I know about this play.

Ryan: A map of the country for when he drives west.

Allen Iverson: A scanner so he knows if the evil Philadelphia cops are lurking behind him.

Al Gore: A radio show so the liberals can quit bitching.

Ryan’s GF: A ball of yarn..she is a cat !!!! MEOW

Avril: A big warm hug to keep her warm on a damn cold night!

Michelle Smith: A new car

Apsen: A Chocolate bar twice the size of her, because sometimes a girl just needs Chocolate…I am not sure what that means.

Jenna: Anything is better than what I got her.

Rick: A crown

Drew: A Christmas Mircale. Read his blog. Some one give him a hug or something
TERMINUS
If I succeded here..its my first HYPER-Link on Tucker's World. Although I doubt I did. I hate Computers.

Alvin from Alvin and the Chipmunks: A hulla-hoop. As far as I know he still wants one.

Ed: Pictures of the crew

Price: Gay porn so he gets discharged.


“Welcome to Comcast Country IV: It Came A Upon a Channel 34 Clear”



Well for my new readers that don’t know the on going story on Tucker’s World. I am documenting what will lead to a monopoly following the Comcast Company’s growth and its occasional abuse of their customers.

In September, the company flipped Comcast Sportsnet which carries all the local sports teams except the Eagles from channel 9 to 69. Now unless you are lucky enough to have digital cable (more than half of their subscribers don’t) You noticed that one or least one of your TVs Comcastsportsnet came in fuzzy and sometimes not at all. After various complaints and phone calls my family never got the problem solved and I was forced to watch the Flyers through my VCR, in order to get a grainy but watchable picture.

Finally they are going to put it on channel 34, and flip the Weather Channel to channel 57. That makes the Hallmark channel go to ….ahh who cares?

Well it took months of customers and bars bitching, and they finally did something about it. But they couldn’t admit their fault and put it back to channel 9. Because I still believe in my heart that it was a scam to drum up more digital customers…It was a nice Christmas present but the company’s dirty tricks are far from over I am afraid.