Tuckers World: The Movie Casting Call

So for no good reason I decided to cast the movie of Tucker's World if they ever made one. Now keep in mind some of the actors don't really look exactly like the parts they are playing,but I just think these actors can nail the parts.

Me= Ben Stiller, since everyone says I look like him. People even say I act like him whatever that means. My backup would be John Cusuack.


Liza= I had Chirstina Ricci or Clarie Danes for her. This had nothing to do with the huge crush I had on Ricci for like two years. However, Liza pointed out the actress Holly Marie Combs who plays Piper on Charmed would be really good at playing her. I watched about 5 minutes of the show and agreed. Something about the way she carries herself. She would make a good Liza.


Drew= Phillip Seymor Hoffman, can't you just picture him sitting there smoking a cigarette bitching about Bush, or talking about movies. I can see him with a shaved head, a beard and a flannel shirt and just disappearing into the roll of Drew.

Jay= Steve Zahn who was in Saving Silverman, and That Thing You Do. Zahn can play Jay well of course there will be lots of scenes with Jay talking about young girls, and showing people pictures of his penis. I think Zahn can handle the role of Jay, and if there is any serious scenes Zahn has proven that he can tone it down in movies like Shattered Glass.

Jenna= Well I was really racking my brain for this one. Then I flipped past a rerun of Cheers. Now I think Kristy Alley would make a perfect Jenna. The only thing is she is getting up there now and all the tabloids say she is really fat now. I really don't see why the are making such a big deal about it since I have seen much fatter. Anyway, as far as personality Alley's Cheers performance was a close as I could come. Any re-casting from my readers would be welcome.

Dan: Sean Connery. Okay, I realize that its totally insane to have Ben Stiller and Sean Connery playing friends who grew up together. Just picture Connery saying lines like "I have 5 Computers, at home, I make 6 figures, and I can't wait to die!". No one else can play this part. IT would be really off the wall, but it will be great.

Price: I think Jaquin Phoenix can nail Price. There is a vauge look that the both share and I think Phoenix might have some comic talents he hasn't really used yet. Maybe a bit like the part he played in Signs. Plus he could pull off being a solider if there were scenes of him at war. My close 2nd went to Matt Damon since he played soilder twice. Some of his parts remined me of Price a bit. Plus Price was always the lady's man of the crew so why not?

Aileen (I am sure I spelled that wrong).
She would be played by Natlie Portman. She can play her being all funny and sweet.


Brant: Okay, I know he looks nothing like Brant. But, I would cast Bernie Mac as Brant. Okay, yes again theres any age gap. However, just picture him trading stocks, hanging out with North JErsey people and grilling stuff through out the movie. Plus they both tell stories in the same fashion only no offense to Brant, Bernic Mac is a lot funnier.

Rick: Steve Buscemi I dunno we always said he could play Rick. Busemi has played the good guy in movies like Ghost World.

Rob: Jason Biggs, yeah why not. Biggs could play drunk Rob great. Not to mention him and Zahn have worked together before so they could play off each other well.

Rich: Tom Welling, I may have the name wrong, but the dude who plays Superman on Smallville.

Kate: Parker Posey

Chris: BD Wong

Harry: Hill Harper who stars on CSI NYC, and he also was on the short lived show The Handler (sniff, sniff). If you never watched either of those shows he played a doctor on the Sopranos last season in the episode where everyone thought Tony got a blow job from Christopher's girlfriend.

Tom: Conan O'brien. Tom is tall. His hair is reddish. He would show up randomly in the film and it would be great.

Ryan: Who?

Reagan: Satan. I think the prince of darkness could really capture the true colors of this character. Oh, I am not talking about the late President here.

Mosco: Billy Crystal. Okay Billy Crystal 10 years ago. He is always talking about dating and relationships. Reminds me of him in the younger roles. IF not maybe a slimed down Kevin James (King of QUeens) his hair dyed black.

Duke: Well it has recently came to my attention that the lead singer of Moron 5 looks like Duke. He kind of does with short hair. Maybe he would like to act. I kicked around the thought of casting Hayden Christensen after seeing Shattered Glass. Duke is prone to fits of rage and maybe he can do that justice. Granted this guy is a fairly lousy actor at least he was Attack of the Clones. That stupid fake cry he did after he murdered the little sand guys. "I Killed them, I kille d them all". NOw just picture him sitting on the floor same voice, but saying It is the lowest point of his life.

Royce: God, help me. I can't cast this one at all. Can someone help here

Ghost of William Penn Who only Keith Can See: Adam West of course.

That Dude that I don't know who reads my blog: Joe Don Baker, so everyone on the set can yell MITCHELL! in between takes. I imagine only 3 people got that joke. Maybe two.

"Eagles Chances"

Well we can't talk pucks. I sense that the excitment for the Eagles might be fairly low among my readership since rarely. Do people respond to the few times I write about them.

Well I am no football expert, but I did predict the Birds to win the Superbowl a month or so ago. That was before T.O. went down though. Despite his lose I don't see them going down to the Vikings this Sunday.

It's still early in the week, but just curious what everyone thinks will happen this Sunday? I mean it is the playoffs, and time to enjoy the ride.

I predict a two touchdown win. What about everyone else?

"Type it Don't Gripe It"

So, we have all been screwed before.

Screwed by something we bought that was broken or food that was bad. Or something that breaks after a few days or those things that look cool in the store that simply dont work.

Well, right before Christmas and right around Turkey Day, Liza and I exchange gifts in honor of when we started dating. Well I got her a box of Whitman Samplers because she loves candy, and I figured if I was lucky I could eat some too.

So, I gave them to her when we exchanged gifts. A few days later she finally opened it when I was hanging out with a friend and she was staying in. She called me to tell me she opened it and they were covered in all that white nasty stuff that chocolate gets when its old.

Now picture this my picture this my sweet girlfriend settling in for the night. Being all happy and cozy in her home. Ready to watch some animal planet and she wants to treat herself to a Whitman Sampler. Only to find that they were likely packaged during the Clinton admistration.

So, now I had to take it back to get my money back. Which ment the next time I saw her I would have to bring it home, then the next day bring it back to the mall, and then she couldn't get it till we saw each other again. So, the present was several days late till it was actually enjoyed.

I was pretty mad,so I got the address of the box and wrote them a letter. I told them how my family always eats them during the holiday season, and my one aunt always gives us a box. I talked about how let down I was that the choclate was bad. In the meantime I got my money back from the Hallmark store in the mall, and got a new box at the CVS in the mall.

So, just after Christmas I got a free box of whitman sampler in the mail. Today I got a letter telling me why they thought the candy went bad and thanked me for bringing it to their attention. They also offered me free shipping for and order of 30 bucks or more good for a year.

Now I don't claim to be the first person to point this out, but it really does work. Everyone rants or bitches to someone, or blogs, or emails a friend about when they get screwed. God knows I was ranting when I got the news that I gave my girlfriend nasty ass candy. So you are going to bitch, just be honest in your letter and they will hook you up.

So, its simple just get your thougts out in microsoft word, and drop a letter in the mail. You are almost certain to get something for free, and feel better about yourself. So, you can sit there and bitch and tell Drew or someone who will just be like that sucks, or you can write a letter and get free stuff. So, you are going to be pissed might as well get something out of it.

Anyone else do this? Give me some good stories. I know Royce has some good ones related to this.

"The Comcast Tower"

Well if you didn't hear by now center city Philly is getting a new skyscrapper. In fact it will not only be the biggest building in the city it will be behind only the Crysler building and the empire states building in NYC for biggest buildings onf the east coast.

Check it out here.