"One Crazy Mother Blogger"

Jenna is back in the blogging business. And by business I mean killing time by writing stuff and not getting paid for it.

Anyway, look like Jenna's blog will have a different tone to it. This time focused more on being a mother and all that stuff. That should be a good read, since my life is about as similar to a "single mother" as it is to a "space alien".

I was alarmed to read that she was cheating on my best friend with a guy named Mason. But by the time I finished jugging my beer in order to empty it and use it as a weapon against the woman who betrayed my best friend I realized it might actually be the same guy.

So, what can we learn from this blog? Perhaps tips on life after one of our condoms breaks? Maybe readers will be so horrified that they will never want to have sex again. Honestly, parenthood to my is like this total mystery. How people do it.

I can only hope that I can return the favor. She could learn the life of a bachelor. Like how to determine what old food in fridge is actually making that awful smell. Or how happens when you drank the last beer and your too drunk or lazy to drive to the liquor store. She may have a blog about how kids keep you from sleeping at night. But what about if you get really into a playstation game, or want to watch just one more Sopranos DVD before bed, is it worth the hour or so less of sleep for the night? Also, where all the damn bitches at?

Now poor "Mason" might be hit in the balls by his son. But, today I wondered to myself, what if I was hurt in my apartment? I don't really have any "pop in friends" and I am constantly losing my cell phone. So, there is a good chance a domestic accident could lead to an early grave. For instance today I was putting my groceries away. I was leaning down packing in the breakfast cereal, but I forgot to close the cabinet door above me where I store plates and drink stuff. So, I cracked my noggin really good on it. As I lay there cursing in my empty apartment laying on the floor flopping around in pain, I thought to myself two things.

First, how come on tv and movies people get knocked out so easily. If I was in a movie or tv show I would be out cold for like 30 mins. Second, what if I really knocked myself out. I would pretty much be laying there for awhile it wasn't the real world. I have the bump on my head to prove it.

I laid there with cartoon birds flying around my head. I thought to myself. I guess that's why people needs a significant others in their lives. Not only for her to give me anotherum, lets say stress reief outlet on a regular basis, so I don't have to wonder if my causal drinking has slid over to "problem" status or not. But, to say, hey jackass, your gonna crack your melon before it's too late.