“The Article Where Tucker Writes About Wawa, but Can’t Think of an Article Title”


So somewhat recently I was at the Sterling Wawa I had purchased a Daily News and pack of gum. They were impulse items after tapping MAC machine. LIZA and I were going to the casinos that night, and oddly enough, the register seemed to know my destination for the night. It made CHA CHING sound, like the many quarters, I would lose later that night. I figured perhaps it was a cash registers with eerie powers that would accurately predict the customers night.

It wasn’t until I went there again when I started hearing laser sounds as I was being rang up. Bleep, bleep, bleep. It sounds like something out of a bad Sci-fi movie. Some other confusing and equally high pitch sounds follow. Apparently, this is part of the new fancy technology that Wawa is getting themselves into. I have a few theories on what reasons they have for this. Perhaps an inside peak on what went on at the marketing meetings.

1. They want people to have fun why they are spending money.
2. They want to annoy the living piss out of their employees
3. They are giving us Cancer
4. The “laser” sounds make us spend more, and grab other items.
5. I have gone totally insane and there are no laser sounds
6. The machines are starting to give warning signs about their rise to power
7. It’s the government trying out “Alien” technology