“24 Years and What Do You Get ?”

Well today I turn one year shy of a quarter of century old. Although 24 is not old by any sense of the imagination I certainly couldn’t wrap my mind around this age as child. It is certainly by many that year that is a watermark for the first year of being an actual adult. In today’s society 21-23 is still giving you a pass as being “college age” especially since people take far more than 4 years now to complete and education. So what is an adult anyway? Depends on the person I guess.

24 usually is the point where nights out looking for a good time are more a novelty than central point of your week and you have to start lining up all your ducks in a row to become more “stable” and “responsible”. Birthdays when you were young were a celebration that of reaching another milestone. You wanted to have a fun party so the kids at school would like you, you wanted to get a bike so you could ride around town, and as you got older you looked forward to freedoms like a driver’s license or being able to legally drink. However I think now that I can be considered by most people in my “mid” 20’s it’s a day of more reflection than anything. Trying to look back at what I have done with my life so far, also trying to measure myself up with expectations of myself and where I wanted to be at this point in the journey in life. Not that I didn’t have an awesome time on Saturday with Liza at the casinos (despite not becoming a millionaire).

The more you think of it though the more you realize something. That life isn’t done in scenes similar to a play or film. One part of your life ending certainly doesn’t necessarily open the next stage door. It is also true what they say that the years go by quicker as you get older. It makes me sound old to even agree with the adage. However I was talking to Dan K (on AIM Dan and I rarely have face to face conversations but a handful of times a year he hates daylight) and we couldn’t quite figure out how I got to 24. He seemed taken back when I told him I was 24 even though he will hit that mark in a few months too. We talked about schoolyard incidents that at times seem like they happened a few months ago.

My life has certainly changed in the past year. Being out of school is certainly a dose of reality and I am learning a lot of hard lessons about making your way in life. I don’t really expect to draw any sympathy by writing this article by any means. In the past year though I have learned how hard it is to cut your niche in the world. I saw many of my friends go through the same thing after college, and thought for some reason I could avoid this fate.


In some aspects its who you know to get you in with a good company. Part of me blames myself for not having a distinct “dream” like our society seemingly dedicates who should have. Sometimes I figure it to mean I am a bad person or am full of short comings. Than again who isn’t? I also think more “prestigious” colleges just mean you went to school for rich people supported by rich people so when you get out you get a job based only on the rich people that your rich family knows in good companies. That’s a bit overly simplified I am sure, but it seems to be a way lots of people get their break in a job. I certainly don’t want to come across as someone who has nothing but excuses for my situation.

Part of me gets sick at the prospect of spending my life working in a cubical. At the same time my current job seems to such more of the life out of me everyday single day. I know I deserve better than Sears. Sears makes me feel like I am in a deep pool with a brick tied to my foot. I am almost out of patience. People who have landed their ideal jobs ( I know very few of them) try to offer me all kinds of advice some of it is applicable and some of it seems too simplified at times even condescending. Of course I know that wasn’t the intention.

Looking back at the 23 year of my life will likely be thought of a year of transition. A year where things and other people went in different paths. I guess that makes me the center of everyone’s universe. Heck two of my friends have started a family together. Meanwhile Duke’s apartment thanks to his new gf is no longer a health hazard. Another close friend of mine ended a long lasting serious relationship, Steve started teaching, Price went to war and Dan decided to tie the knot.

To be honest I would still consider Ryan to be my closest friend. That might seem odd, and unfortunately relations with his girlfriend and me and friends of mine boiled over into quite an ugly situation this past summer. Most parties at this point agree that it just water under the bridge anymore though. Although Ryan is extremely busy with music obligations these days he seems to be with drawn a lot from everyone this past year. Do I expect to hear from him on my b-day or him to even read this? Not really. His withdrawal is some what particular and one has to wonder what really goes on in his head these days. I guess this stuff is goes hand in hand with an increased amount of b-days.

If you asked me on my 23 b-day if I would have met the right girl for me I doubt I would have said I would been lucky enough to find her. Well it was last November that I met Liza, and I certainly thought she was out of me league the first time I laid eyes on her. I always knew if a girl would have given me a chance I could prove that I was capable of managing a serious relationship. I met her at a time where she gives me seemingly endless source of strength to keep me from putting myself down too much and helps me through the frustrations of my current job situation. I am my own worst critic and she lets me know when I am simply being unreasonable about it. She has made me certainly a stronger person and had a positive impact on my life. I have better self esteem than I did a year ago. I no longer have to look at the bottom of a beer mug when I am soul searching not that I was ever a raging drunk or anything. It wasn’t like I got smashed every time I had a bad day she somehow (maybe without trying) made me realize how unimportant in order to be happy. The feeling of knowing that I can talk to her about anything in my life far exceeds being drunk in the back of someone’s car after a night out. It isn’t like she even cares if I get drunk as skunk, but I never thought I would be so content and happy with someone that I would not notice or care that I rarely get smashed anymore. I just have less of a need to get drunk. This being my first long term relationship I learned a lot about realationships.


I look around the world and read the papers. I certainly have it a lot better than a good part of the world’s population and I certainly have a lot of time to figure things out in my life. I am fortunate to have good friends and a good family and a great girl. So what this day will pass without tons of fanfare like when I was a kid. What I learned about myself and life since my b-day could fill a book. I guess that’s the perk that comes with b-days after you reach all the cool milestones. I still have tons to learn and plan to get out on my own before my next b-day so I am sure this year wil seem like peanuts to that. Is it too late for anyone to get apartment shopping for dummies or cooking for dummies for a present?