“You miss 100 % of the shots you never take”----- Wayne Gretzky

The FINAL DAYS of COLLEGE continues with the tale of two people that are not me, by the time most of you read this I will be leaving my last class EVER.


“You Can Always Go Home Again”



Some things make me feel uncomfortable and uneasy. Regan telling me she is cat. Imposter honey mustard at Starview Diner. Blue Flyers jerseys. Willam H. Macy’s face. Most recently added to the list was Christopher Brandon Arter not living in South Jersey anymore if you recall from Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Arter Chris went west to Pennsylvania to get an education.

The poor tyke came close to losing his mind. In several IM conversations I had with him I wondered how close he was to snapping completely. He was one miserable Arter. Thankfully, all of that has changed and he is back on his way to the land of the 24- hour diners. His school is distant memory and he should be arriving back in Somerdale soon.
As I leave the hallowed halls of Rowan, Chris will be showing up there with his ax ready to jam. This will reunite him with Ryan and I am sure the music department will be glad to have him. I wonder if he will get his degree before Ryan. Perhaps he can help comfort all the weeping girls that will be all over the campus in January when the reality sinks in I am not coming back.

Well Chris gave it a shot an attempt to get out of South Jersey. Everyone should at least try to get out at one point in their life just to say they made an attempt. There is a whole world out there. Apparently Chris stumbled upon one lamer than this one. I am glad he came back to the home of high car insurance rates and people who drink WOODater. If you see him before I do give him a big hug unless of course your homophobic.

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Many people have emailed me and said…well Tucker I am enjoying your last days of college series…but what about the people who didn’t go to college? Okay no one emailed me that. As if this guy’ ego isn’t already bigger than Texas I have cut and pasted a rough draft for an assignment I had one of my first weeks at Rowan. 2 years later he makes even more money and is even more miserable.


“It’s a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.” -----Somerset Maugham

“Dan the Man”

While most 19-yearold guys spend their free time trying to find where the next party is or a fake ID, Dan Hemphill has his nose buried in a book about Unix a complex computer operating system. However most guys don’t land a job that will earn them six figures by the time their 21 and be able to boast that they are the number one sales person in the world. Not bad considering he never received a college degree.

Roughly a year after high school after many years of self-education Hemphill may not have realized how wise behind his years he was. At 19, Hemphill enrolled at Computer Learning Center, and was seeking part time work to pay for tuition and other bills. So Hemphill went on an interview at the Micro-warehouse headquarters in Gibbsboro, New Jersey a privately owned company that and # 1 reseller of computer parts on the planet. Normally doesn’t hire people who are barely old enough to vote, but in this case they made an acceptation. When the interviewer asked Dan some difficult questions he was taken back by the fact that he seemingly knew more than anyone at the company.

Micro-warehouse was so impressed with Hemphill that they encouraged him to leave his education at CLC for a full-time job with the company. Hemphill declined because he wanted to farther his education at CLC. However it didn’t take long for Dan to realize that his knowledge was going to waste. He recalls often times sitting in the classroom and correcting errors teachers were making. During Hemphill’s years of self-education he had already mastered everything being covered in the class. He knew he wanted something more challenging. A few weeks later Hemphill returned to Micro Warehouse and was hired immediately.

Hemphill’s joined the sales team, which mainly consisted of college graduates with diverse degrees. Hemphill’s technique however was different from the typical sales people. His technical knowledge combined with his ability to communicate well with people were the right ingredients for moving up in the company. Hemphill has a knack for navigating through web sites and finding companies that are starting out and ideal customers.
“When I call up a customer, I make sure I am not reading some kind of rant, because that’s a major turn off. When I call up a potential client, or a current client I act as if I am simply calling up a buddy.”

This gives Hemphill the edge, because ordinarily when clients have a technical question about equipment or trouble shooting the sales person has to call upon a technician. Hemphill’s vast knowledge allows customers to go straight to him when a problem arises. If someone in the building has a question, they go straight to Hemphill, including the Engineers.

Watching Hemphill do sale reveals how he is up on technology. Hemphill does all his work in the computer. He never uses pen or paper to write anything down during an entire phone conversation. The only time he uses a pen is to sign his name on checks.

“ Dan is stunningly efficient to say the least when it comes to his sales approach and work ethic” says William Mcintyre who has worked in sales for 7 years and along side Hemphill for almost two.

It did not take Hemphill long to make an impression on the company. He set a company record by being promoted to senior sales in only 3 months. Hemphill’s sales achievements earned him a spot in the presidents club, and the best of the best. Naturally Hemphill’s talents have caught the attention of similar companies who have offered him other jobs including a networking opportunity in Boston, and a sales position for Silicon Valley in California.